Batman Blues

I'd like to complain about the bats.

Firstly, I don't think there are enough of them. From what I've been able to see, we have four at the most. I just don't think that's enough. We got more sparrows than that. We've got more starlings than that. We've even got more collared doves than that. It's a pathetic showing, bats, sort it out!

We've also got insects that are crap at time management. May bugs. Look at it carefully - the clue is in the question. **MAY** Bugs. It's July 13th - what's THAT all about?? The trees, are swarming with May Bugs. They are a type of beetle that are harmless to humans - unless you're scared of them, and they are big, noisy, and generally gross. They swarm around trees. And houses. And specifically chimneys - which they fly DOWN. If you have a chimney that is open in any way more than a few centimetres, you'll end up with May Bugs swarming out of your fireplace while you're trying to watch TV - this is NOT FUN AT ALL. We've got around this problem by putting cardboard up over the fireplace.

Given that they are attracted to light, and are not very smart, they also throw themselves against your windows. They are large, and have quite hard skin/shell (not sure if they are truly exoskeletal) - so when they smack into your windows, it makes a loud noise that can be frightening.

I said they're harmless to humans - not so to plants. In the bug stage, they eat leaves. The females lay about 200 eggs - but they lay them underground - they dig holes, and bury them. When the eggs hatch, the lavae eat plant roots. So you've got the lavae attacking the roots, and the bugs attacking the leaves - not good.

So - much like someone you could probably name in your office - May Bugs have absolutely no redeeming or endearing features that I'm aware of.

Which is where the bats SHOULD come in - bats eat insects. But I think our bats take one look at these SWARMS (and I'm talking black clouds here) of May Bugs, and do a runner! This should work out perfectly - the May Bugs come out just after dusk - when the birds have gone to bed - but that should also be when the bats are around. So - again - shout going out to the bats - SORT IT OUT!!!

Too late now - but - next year - bat box going up on the side of our house!

In other news - I found the Great Wall of China on Google Earth. It was in China. Big Surprise.